Now that the Bulls play in pink…

You lot seen this?

According to Supersport.com, “The Vodacom Bulls have launched their new away kit – a combination of pink and purple “inspired by the Jacaranda trees of Pretoria.”"

Riiiiiiiiiight. It’s a good thing for all opposition players that Bakkies Botha left to Toulon. Otherwise, people would be forced to mock him for his pretty pink rugby jersey. And then he’d stomp their faces into the ground. Repeatedly. Because he can.

Anyway, not ones to waste an instant when it comes to wisecracking, some rugby fans (and obviously NOT Bulls loyalists) have posted some new rules for my beloved team and game time. Allow me to present:

Now that the Bulls play in pink…:

1. One lucky season ticket holder will win a free make-over during half time of each match.
2. Fans will no longer be allowed to braai before kick-off, instead fondue stations will be available for snacks.
3. The beer tent will no longer sell beer, but a wide variety of fruity drinks will be available.
4. The dancing girls will be replaced by a French poodleparade.
5. The man of the match will not receive a trophy, but rather a subscription to House and Home magazine.
6. The yellow card area will not be referred to as the sin bin, but will now be known as the temper tantrum tank.
7. The stadium will change from the Bull-Ring to the Fairy Garden.
8. The new mascot will be Lady the French Poodle.
9. A booth will be provided to exchange those dangerous horned helmets for the more appropriate silk scarf.
10. Liefling will still be the unofficial song.